Bread and Wine, Part 1

What an honor it was to receive Shauna Niequist's new book Bread and Wine early so I can review it!  It comes out in April and is different than her previous two writings because it is interspersed with recipes.

Let me just say, I truly love her writing and style.  It totally hits home with me.  It's normal and relatable yet deep enough to hit parts of your inner self that you feel you have been wanting to say all along.  I find myself saying "Yes!  Thank you!"  in the midst of reading her books because she voices what so many of us are struggling to find the words for.

This is her third book and I was particularly looking forward to reading it because of how much it hits home for me and my close group of friends.  Bread and Wine is about the table... the food we eat... and the moments we share in those settings.  How it's important to have community and live this life together, not winging it all on our own.

Soon after college, a small group of friends decided to start every other week dinners.  The day of the week has shifted a bit due to jobs etc. but we have pressed on to keep a consistent schedule through thick and thin.  People have come and gone, mainly due to moving towns etc., but the core has stayed throughout the past 7 years.  Yea.  I'm pretty sure it's been 7 years!  Wow!

Children have been added, houses have changed, but nonetheless every other Thursday we rotate cooking and host the whole group.  Sometimes, when it gets particularly busy, we head out to the yummiest Mexican restaurant or favorite local place, Jenkins Deli.  Even the hubbies come with the babies if the wives have a commitment.  Since I'm the only one not married, we joke sometimes about who will fill that "spot" with me because clearly, they will have to be accepted by the whole crew.

So when Shauna talks about the table and all it holds, it brings tears to my eyes because that's us!  This is one of my most favorite quotes from the book:

“It’s those five faces around the table that keep me sane, that keep me safe, that protect me from the pressures and arrows and land mines of daily life. And it isn’t because we do all the same things, live all the same ways, believe all the same things. We are single and married, liberal and conservative, runners and adamant nonathletes, mothers and not. Those of us who are mothers do 
it differently, from cry-it-out to family bed, from stay-at-home to full-time work. Around this table we’ve mourned the loss of eight pregnancies, and even as I write those words, it seems a cruel and unusual number.

We’ve gone to funerals and birthday parties together, reported bad test results, gotten advice about sick kids, made trips to
 the ER, walked together through postpartum depression. We’ve visited each other’s babies in the hospital, and we’ve brought over meals and sleepers and blankets. We’ve talked about faith and fear and fighting with our husbands, sleeping through the night and anxiety and how to ask for help when we need it.”        -p. 30

The babies... the challenges... the tears... the changes... the parenting... the frustrations... we've talked about it all.  I remember sitting at one of our dinners when I told everyone I was moving to Cambodia and how all I received was support and love from them all.  Sometimes us girls will go in the back room while a new mommy has to nurse and we talk about all the nonsense girly things while 3 year old E jumps naked on the bed dancing Gangnam Style.  I mean-there's never a dull moment.

Another quote from the book has also proven to be true with these friends:

“We don’t learn to love each other well in the easy moments. Anyone is good company at a cocktail party. But love is born when we misunderstand one another and make it right, when we cry
 in the kitchen, when we show up uninvited with magazines and granola bars, in an effort to say, I love you.”  -p. 132

So true.  It's in the ugly and not so fun moments where we gain that ground with one another.  

I have many other friends who provide this type of support as well, and of course, we too connect around the table.  Sometimes my family makes fun of me and how many "close" friends I have, but I value loyalty in friendship and try to provide it as well.  

Bread and Wine lifts your spirits and reminds you that you're not the only one out there doing what you're doing.  And even though deep down we know that, we must provide and work for the atmosphere to remind us of that.  Work the for table and all the affirmations it holds.    

(Bread and Wine: Part 2, to come.  I will focus on the recipes I cooked for our book club night and maybe throw in a few more quotes from the book!) 

Shauna Niequist is the author of Cold Tangerines and Bittersweet, and Bread & Wine. Shauna grew up in Barrington, Illinois, and then studied English and French Literature at Westmont College in Santa Barbara. She is married to Aaron, who is a pianist and songwriter. Aaron is a worship leader at Willow Creek and is recording a project called A New Liturgy. Aaron & Shauna live outside Chicago with their sons, Henry and Mac. Shauna writes about the beautiful and broken moments of everyday life--friendship, family, faith, food, marriage, love, babies, books, celebration, heartache, and all the other things that shape us, delight us, and reveal to us the heart of God.